RO-CABULARY: Unique words or phrases that either I or my friends coined or adopted. As I think of others I will add them.

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BETH RULE
Coined by: Me
Definition: Stop talking; others may be listening.
Source: One night at dinner after a particularly bad day, I was running my mouth off about work when suddenly I realized a co-worker of mine (“Beth”) was sitting at the table directly behind me. While I never found out if Beth overheard our conversation, what came out of that was the “Beth Rule.” Any time Susan or I begin talking about work (or anything private), if one of us notices other people around, we will say “Beth Rule” and the other person will stop talking until we get to a more private area. Often used in restaurants, parking lots, and other public places where you are unsure of who can hear your conversation.

F.O.F.
Coined by: Co-Worker
Stands For: “F Off Friday”
Definition: Coined by the same co-worker who once told me, “my hair grows on company time so I get it cut on company time.” A F.O.F. is a Friday in which the goal is to do no work. I rarely have F.O.F.’s, but I have used to term to describe other people’s work output on Fridays on occasion.

HERBIE’S BRAND
Coined by: Justin
Definition: Generic Brand
Source: Back when almost all of my Commodore friends had Commodore-brand modems, my friend Justin got a dirt cheap one made by a company named Herbie. “Herbie’s Brand” is his word for a completely generic knock-off brand, which I adopted.

KENNEDY HAIR
Coined by: Me
Definition: When someone’s hair is sticking up and/or out. If you don’t get the somewhat crude reference, check out frame 313 of the Zapruder Film…

MULTIPLE SADNESS
Source: Witchboard (1986)
Definition: Major bummer.
Comment: Jeff and I watched this movie many times as kids. You can see and hear this line at the 12:00 minute mark of the film, available on Youtube here. (Jump to 11:45 for context.)

PLOTADOX
Coined by: Me
Definition: Something unrealistic that a character in a movie or film plot does for the sole sake of creating a conflict.

SCHADENFRAUD
Coined by: Justin
Definition: A pleasure derived from using words to make one’s self feel superior to another.
Comment: Coined after seeing the word “schadenfreude” appear in one too many online articles.

SHIGGLES
Coined by: Read it online
Definition: A combination of two words. The second one is “giggles.”

SHOFFEE
Coined by: A friend of mine
Definition: The poop one immediately takes after drinking copious amounts of coffee.

SKID MARKEE
Coined by: Me
Definition: My fake rap name. My other fake rap name was “Lo Lo Daddy Pimp Master G.” Skid Markee was easier to say.

SWEET DADDY LOVE
Coined by: Jeff Deckard
Definition: Exclamation.
Source: When we were kids we played a lot of football in my neighborhood. Any time something amazing happened (like me catching the ball), Jeff would exclaim, “Sweet Daddy Love!” I have no idea if he made it up or got it from somewhere else, but I got it from him and still occasionally utter it.