Best Buy meets The Jerk

One of my dad’s favorite jokes comes from a scene in Steve Martin’s The Jerk. In the scene, Navin R. Johnson (Martin) has taken a job as a midway carnie. After someone wins the game he is tending, he begins to explain what prizes they can choose from. “Anything below this shelf, but above this shelf. Anything between here, and here,” he says, while gesturing to the smallest item on the shelf. “Anything left of here, but right of here, right in this general area,” he says, again gesturing to the smallest item on the shelf. Eventually his hands form a square about the size of a postage stamp. “Anything in this area right here,” he says.

My dad and I recycle this joke anytime someone offers us a choice of something and then immediately follows it by a limitation in choices. For example, one time we went to Braums to get some ice cream. “I’ll take some chocolate,” I said. “We’re all out of chocolate.” Then I picked cookies and cream. “We’re all out of cookies and cream,” the lady replied. Then, the joke comes out. “So, you can have any flavor of ice cream as long as it’s below this line, in this general area …”

In today’s mailbox I got a free $10 gift card for Best Buy. In the sorta-fine print, the card says that it’s valid with any $100 purchase. In the regular fine print, it reads:

“Qualifying purchases exclude contract cellular phones and cellular phone contracts, notebooks and desktop computers, monitors, projectors, internal hard drives, desktop packages (packages include computer, monitor and printer), In Home Geek Squad Services, VIOP, Broadband, HP ink and paper, video game hardware, Apple products, Bose products, JBL and Shure MP3 player accessories, Zune players, satellite radio service, digital music services and download cards, Gift Cards, taxes, prior purchases, special order, clearance, demo and open-box items.”

In other words, the gift card is good for purchases “below this shelf, to the right of this area, in this general area …”

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