Thursday, I came out to the work parking lot to find my car looking like this:

(This picture was taken at home.)

The previous owner of the Scion replaced the stock grill with a custom Billet grill, one of at least suspect quality. The grill was originally held in place by four screws welded to the back of the grill, which then attach to a bracket mounted to the car. Prior to my taking ownership, two of the screw welds had already broken off, and the right half of the grill was being held in place by a couple of zip ties. I’m not sure what happened Thursday: either someone backed into the grill, someone walked by my car and yanked the grill off, or somehow the screws magically broke off while the car was parked. Regardless of how or why, I had to figure out a way to reattach the grill to the car.

As you can see, the interior recesses of the grill aren’t cut out — they were just painted black, to make it look as if they were cut out. Half of the black paint is missing, which gives the grill a cow print look. No good.

I decided to take some permanent black paint and repaint the recessions. At first I was very careful and was taping off the lines, but I found that the paint could be pretty easily wiped off the metal while it was still wet, so near the end I just started painting everything and wiping up the excess with a rag.

With the painting done, I still needed a way to reattach the grill to the brackets. The four mounting bolts on the back of the grill are all completely broken off, leaving nothing but a smooth surface. I considered drilling a hole through the grill and mounting it that way, but the holes and bolts wouldn’t match the grill’s smooth lines. I briefly considered using zip ties like the previous owner, but … no.

Then it hit me — GORILLA GLUE!

I’ve used Gorilla Glue once before. It’s like Super Glue, except it expands, like that expanding spray foam. Gorilla Glue is cheap, permanent, and Gorillawesome. After cleaning the back of the grill and the front of the brackets, I applied a liberal amount of Gorilla Glue to the mounting point, affixed the grill in place, and applied a couple of clamps for pressure.

After sitting overnight … success!

I’ve already taken the Scion into town this morning and the glue is holding perfectly. Even a moderate tug at the grill won’t get it to budge at this point. To assure permanence, I applied a bit more Gorilla Glue to the sides and rear of the bracket. That grill’s not going anywhere anytime soon.