I am, quite possibly, the world’s worst when it comes to buying things in hopes of reselling them — “flipping”, as it’s known. The concept is simple enough (“buy low, sell high”), but every time I try it I either (A) buy high and sell low, or (B) buy low and get stuck with it.

There was the time I bought 300 computer keyboards (in my defense, kind of by accident) and tried to resell them. Most of those ended up in the trash. There was the time I bought four jukeboxes, hoping to sell three to cover the price of the fourth. In transit, three of the four broke and I was never able to fix them. I lost about a grand on that deal. There was the time I bought twenty trash cans at an auction. Anyone want to buy a trash can?

Then there was the time I bought six computer monitors.

Before we all had LCD flat panel monitors, we had CRT monitors; remember those? In the early days of computing, 12″ and 13″ monitors were common. In the early 90s, 14″ monitors became the standard, followed by 15″, 17″, 19″, and finally 21″ . screens. A 21″ CRT monitor is a beast of a monitor, usually deeper than it is wide and heavier than the computer it’s connected to. As flat panel monitors began growing in popularity (and dropping in price), companies began exchanging their old CRT monitors for newer technology.

At an auction back in 2002 I think (I gotta learn to stay away from those things …), I discovered a company doing just that. At that time I had a 17″ monitor at home and was looking to upgrade, and I knew a lot of other people who wouldn’t have minded owning a giant monitor as well. I want to say that around that time, new 21″ monitors were selling for around $400, so I was shocked to see these monitors selling for less than $100.

I immediately pulled out my cell phone and began calling people, asking them if they were interested in a 21″ for $100. I got enough “yeses” to convince me to buy six monitors. I paid $75 per monitor ($450) and planned on reselling 5 of them for $100 each ($500), leaving me with a free 21″ monitor and $50 for my trouble.

That was the plan, anyway. What could possibly go wrong?

For starters, 21″ CRT monitors are bigger than they look from across the room at an auction. These monitors were 20″ wide, 20″ tall, and almost 24″ deep. That’s basically a two-foot cube sitting on your desk. They’re also heavy — like, really heavy. I don’t know if computer monitors have cement in them or something, but these monitors seemed to be much heavier than a television of the same size. I lugged mine upstairs (no easy task) and put it on my computer desk. A couple of months later, the top of the desk actually broke.

One by one as I showed the monitors to people, they declined to buy one. I lowered my asking price from $100 to $75 (in hopes of breaking even) and finally $50 (in hopes to getting rid of them), but no one was interested. These things were just too big for their own good.

Of the six monitors, I ended up using one, one went to Dad, one went into a MAME Arcade Cabinet, and the other three have been sitting in my garage for seven years. The window of opportunity to part with these monitors was small to begin with, and completely closed as LCD monitors quickly took over.

I have gone as far as to offer these monitors to friends for free, with the caveat that they come pick them up (I’m being serious; these things are unbelievably heavy). I couldn’t even give them away! At one point I even ran an ad on Craigslist, asking $20/monitor (to weed out the absolute riff-raff). Nothing.

Here at home we get calls from donation centers at least once a month offering to come to our house and pick up donations from our front porch. I learned earlier this year that they’ll pick up just about anything — including CRT monitors. A few months ago I donated all of my old 14″, 15″ and 17″ monitors. Tonight, I moved (with the help of a dolly) the last three 21″ monitors out to the front porch.They are every bit as big and heavy as I remembered. Good luck to the guy who has to move them tomorrow.

Every time I dump things I bought to resell I swear I’ll never do it again. Unfortunately, this usually only lasts until the next great deal comes along.